Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Randomize
