Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
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