May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
third nipple confirmed
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
Randomize
