I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
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