I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
Randomize
