I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva".
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
We have started to decorate penises.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
Randomize
