so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
Randomize
