i was rollin on her like bob the builder
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Randomize
