Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
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