You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
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