Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
This is the prime rib incident all over again
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
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