what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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