Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
Randomize
