he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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