Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
