his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize
