Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
Randomize
