you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
my poor anus
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
My vagina just clenched in fear
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
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