I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
