Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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