It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize