Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
is that a dick in a sweater?
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
