i just wanna soil my oats bro
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
Randomize
