Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize
