Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
no you cant smoke seaweed
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
That was before I lit my hair on fire
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