i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
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