She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
Randomize
