You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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