I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
