the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
You were trust falling into bushes
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Randomize
