the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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