he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
how do flat chested girls get laid?
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
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