your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
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