I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
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