I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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