I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Randomize
