I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
Randomize
