Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
Randomize
