yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
Randomize
