I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
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