Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
Randomize
