hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
Randomize
