so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
