He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
Randomize
