We're facebook friends in real life
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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