I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Randomize
