dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
Randomize
