ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
My ATM looks so different sober.
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
Randomize
