So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
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