He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
I was giving him a blow job in the kitchen, but it was uncomfortable. so i took the oven mitts and used them as knee pads.
Don't tell me i'm not fucking resourceful.
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
Randomize
